April Fools: The Tea Party Jumps the Shark

The kind of man who wants the government to adopt and enforce his ideas is always the kind of man whose ideas are idiotic.

- H.L. Mencken

It is exactly as I predicted. The gaggle of angry Americans suffering from collective insanity, willful ignorance and a raw and seething fury over the audacity of a black man being elected President are being thrown under the bus by their cynical Republican saviors. It was always ludicrous to the nth degree that the assclowns, haters, perverts, greedballs and rubber fetus crowd of the Republican base could hope that a re-branding along with the hijacking of a libertarian based pro-American values movement would end up as anything but a mockery. The other day when a few hundred (a generous count from eyewitnesses accounts) pasty white fat old people, a pack of costumed loons dressed up like Captain America or in the ridiculous colonial American garb gathered in the rain to listen to the rancid Rand Paul and moonbat Michelle Bachmann wail in ginned up outrage outside of Congress that the movement had truly jumped the shark. While the majority of the cretins don't get it yet they are as radioactive as Fukashima and as they have slowly evolved into a gross parody of themselves the only aspiring politicians still attracted to the lamentable overly hyped Astroturf uprising are egomaniacs and charlatans like newly minted champion of the Birthers that is the aggravating and slimy parasite named Donald Trump. I can hardly wait until next year when the greatest freak show on the planet will descend upon the Tampa Bay area when the Republican National Convention comes to town. It's gonna be the biggest magnet for the deranged this area has seen since the great angry hordes descended on Pinellas Park to gang rape the brain dead living corpse that was Terri Schiavo.

The teabaggers never would have been taken seriously to begin with were not the establishment plutocrats enamored with the idea of fielding their very own Sturmabteilung to bully, intimidate, harangue and mislead as they acted to put  the post-Bush disgraced GOP back into power. The Dick Armey of Darkness was an Operation Gladio style stay-behind network to sabotage any meaningful effort at systemic reform that would potentially rollback fascist right-wing gains of the past three decades. With a corrupt media spinning ever increasingly insane demand by the scumbaggers into a wag the dog style of populist uprising the useful idiots served their purpose in returning Republicans to power in 2010. The big assists must be given to not only corporate propaganda organs like Murdoch's Wall Street Journal, in which NO serious challenge to the power structure would ever be referred to in such reverence as the tea party but to the raw cynicism and gross fecklessness of the Obama administration which alienated the traditional Democratic party base and kept them home in droves on election day. Now that the Koch Brothers have their hand picked governors in place in numerous states where whatever remains of the regulatory structure and social safety net will be destroyed with extreme prejudice the buffoonish teabaggers are going to understand exactly what happens when such a collection of vicious goons lose their usefulness to the party leadership - just think Night of the Long Knives.

I happen to actually know several of the suckers who suddenly, after years of George W. Bush racking up the national credit card with not a peep became shrieking, talking point spewing deficit hawks, howling about how Barack Obama's wee wee isn't circumcised which proved he was a secret Muslim/Commie out to send forth his militant black army ACORN to enslave the good ole white working folks. They began to harp on the Kenyan anti-colonialist worldview of Obama, raved about death panels, unions and did their damned level best to pour as much money into Glenn Beck's bank account by buying his ghostwritten tripe that subsidizes his millionaire faux populism. When I asked one about how could he possibly compare and contrast the reputed Kenyan anti-colonialism of Obama with the anti-colonial worldview of the Founding Fathers that they so like to selectively quote he got that thousand yard stare and quickly changed the subject to George Soros. One has to have somewhat of a sick sense of humor to remain sane in this rotting empire these days, were those who actually subscribed to the horseshit peddled by the Koch Brothers network of think tanks, extreme radical Christian domination of the churches and are convinced that we are engaged in a steel cage death match crusade to halt the coming of Sharia law and the Islamic caliphate not legion they would be easier to dismiss. Now that they are being peeled off of the Republican elephant's ass like blood-sucking leeches they are only going to become more desperate. How long will it be until some freak Christian group or militia sets off a mass casualty attack here in the USA? Of course it isn't terrorism if the white people do it, like the white supremacist yahoo who left a backpack bomb along a Martin Luther King day parade route in Spokane . The enablers of the angry white army who benefit from using them as droogs sure has zero interest in examining the threat of domestic white terrorism. But Herr Liebermann and the Irish Republican Army supporting turd Peter King preside from on high against the hated scapegoated Muslims.

Never have I seen such a credulous collection of saps in my lifetime. The teabaggers will believe anything which they hear from the payroll propagandists, haters, fifth-columnists and demonic false prophet preachers with their slime campaigns out to paint Obama as an anti-American at best and the Antichrist himself at worst. Now this may seem sick but I have this twisted little fantasy, I wish that Obama did have a huge nefarious conspiracy to rid America once and for all of Raptureheads, Teabaggers, Deathers, red state fascists and assorted outher dumbasses. I would love it if he had the balls to just give the order to round up and relocate these vicious swine to some sort of reeducation camps, if they could be saved great, do the necessary lobotomies and send them back into society to pick beans and clean toilets, the jobs that after all 'Americans just won't do' according to the talking points. And if not just march them into an industrial sized Soylent Green style meatgrinder and puree their asses up into a fine pulp (omitting the children from their dead-ender loser parents of course whose removal from their lives would free them from a lifetime of willful ignorance and bible study) mix it with plenty of bean sprouts, soy sauce and water chestnuts and sell it to the Chinese as egg roll stuffing or something. Baby Trig Palin and his football shaped head could be auctioned off on EBay to some high-rolling degenarate  Asian cocksuckers like the ones in Faces of Death who revel in eating fresh monkey brains directly out of the poor creature's skull. Sadly, given the pathological nature of American corporations to trade shit and shinola back and forth it would all likely end up as 2.99 per pound sausage on a stick at your local big blue smiley Wal-Mart superstore. Christ only knows what sort of raw agricultural waste and human sewage ends up being made into coleslaw at their delis. Just don’t gas them in the camps, it may spoil the flavor of their diseased flesh that could otherwise be passed off to the Meskin’ hating Becker bottom feeders as chorizo sausage in their frozen breakfast burritos.

Of course the sheer hypocrisy has contributed much to the downfall of the teabaggers, while howling and dancing around like a bunch of buffoons waving their Gadsen flags about the evils of the deficit, the needed purity rituals to take their country back and the growth of big government they are truly full of shit. Were the teabaggers concerned about big government and the deficit they would surely call for the immediate end of the imperialism of the Military Industrial Corporate Complex which these diseased, death worshipping bumpkins just adore, hell, carpet bombing sand niggers is nearly as good as NASCAR. The big government that they denounce with bogus passion that is only outwardly projected self-loathing (deservedly) is just fine with them as long as it consists of a gargantuan police state apparatus that they can one use to round up gays, libruls [sic], Muslims and illegal immigrants. A police state that has a high tech capability to allow the bible thumping prudes and ignoramuses to spy on the private behavior of others, and the more that it is about sex the better because with the crowd there is nothing that has more clarity than the two ideas of the vengeful bloodthirsty omnipotent God and that poking Mr. Wiggly into the dirty place isn't anything that Jesus would approve of. Which just doesn't seem so outrageous to them when it is pederast priests and pedophile preachers doing the poking. The lack of outrage towards Wall Street also defines the scumbagger schmucks, were they anything less than the malleable dolts and dupes that they always have been they would be marching with pitchforks and torches towards the swanky headquarters of Goldman Sachs, JP Morgan, Citi and Bank of America and storming the barricades of the corrupt high-rolling swine responsible for the economic collapse. It is a strange dichotomy that the dumb bastards regularly rail against teachers and their weakened unions but have zero qualms about the oligarchy grinding their bones to make their bread but you just can't put lipstick on a pig or polish a turd, the Tea Party is what it is, the dregs of American society and the product of the war against the public education system. I really makes one wonder whether the early 20th Century elite just may have been onto something when they championed eugenics (yes, Hitler actually got a good deal of his ideas from the USA) and sterilization to keep the mentally inferior from reproducing. In retrospect, just how many of these fucking flag-waving borderline retards would have been born had that idea gotten more traction in it's time?

I will be watching with much interest to see if the Republican dog is wagged by the Tea Party tail will have the gonads to actually shut down the government this week. The orange man John Boehner is feeling the heat as the angry army is getting more restive by the day that there hasn't been legislation to make Obama cough up his birth certificate and is backed into a corner now. Any capitulation would potentially doom this career hack and allow an ambitious little pit viper like Eric Cantor to harness the uncontrollable monster of the cultural populist uprising that has been fed by the Kochs and their ilk. The latest jagoff to overstate his importance is some nitwit from Wisconsin named Paul Ryan who yesterday rolled out a budget proposal to cut over 4 trillion from big gubmint spending over the next decade. Of course military spending is ok as are tax cuts for the rich but anything that helps the poor is of course under the ax. Ryan, like so many of these other right-wing pigfuckers looks amazingly like a Nazi, just check out some old WWII footage and you will notice that there is an amazing resemblance between nearly all of these dipshits and their historical predecessors, just slap a Colonel Klink hat on Ryan and he'd fit right in. The GOP budget, with the typical Orwellian sounding name The Path to Prosperity is being touted by the moneychanger's gospel that is Murdoch's Wall Street Journal, then again so was the Tea Party and all of the other frauds.

Me, I say shut it down too. Let these pasty fat haters practice what they preach and not receive their medicare and social security checks, see how popular that the Beckers find that one. Boehner, Ryan and their ilk may find out very quickly that the Tea Party platform can be easily converted into a gallows.

Just my two cents over the morning cup o' joe

EE